Arnold's Last Stand
by PrincessWaluigi666
Summary: An unspeakable tragedy strikes Ms. Frizzle's class. And now Phoebe has to deal with a great loss. Rated M for bad language.
1. Chapter 1

Arnold's Last Stand

Chapter 1: Sacrifice

I twas a bright, beautiful morning in the Permian Period, 252 million years before man and 20 million years before the first dinosaurs. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, until some peculiar visitors appeared…

Out of a bright flash of light emerged a yellow school bus with a face. It did a "meep meep" sound like a roadrunner. The side of the bus opened, and out emerged a middle-aged woman with frizzy red hair put into a bun wearing a purple dress patterned with Saturns. She had a very eccentric grin on her face.

"So here we are in the Permian Era class! As my third cousin Nignog used to say, "Get out there and explore!" the woman said.

"WIll we see dinosaurs yet Ms. Frizzle?" said a fat kid wearing a lime-green shirt with a big, red, stupid "R" on it. He also wore a red baseball cap turned backwards.

"Well Ralphie," responded a girl with blonde pigtails wearing a purple turtleneck sweater, "According to my research, dinosaurs weren't around yet, the fauna in this time consisits mostly of synapsids and other primitive reptiles."

"We don't need a lecture, Dorothy Ann!" interrupted a black girl with curly brown hair tied into a ponytail atop her head wearing a magenta and blue sweater dress.

"Hopefully this ends better than the last time we time travelled…" said a shorter asian girl with a pink shirt and red vest. "They still think that the second shooter was a government agent…"

"You just HAD to pull that fire that second shot when JFK was driving by, didn't you Wanda?" remarked a black boy with curly hair and a blue shirt,

"You could say he's locked and loaded about it!" joked a latino boy with black hair and a blue hoodie.

"CARLOS!" everyone scolded.

After some difficulty, out emerged two kids holding hands. One of them was a skinny, scraggly-looking boy with glasses, orange curly hair and was wearing a yellow and white-striped polo shirt. The other one was a girl with brown hair that went down only to her bottom jaw, and a yellow headband on top. She was wearing a red, overall dress with a yellow long sleeve undershirt. The girl's abdomen was round and distended.

"So Phoebe, i've been thinking about naming him Arnold Jr."

"But what if it's a girl?" questioned Phoebe. "In that case we should name her Amber."

"Come on Phoebe, you and I both know that's a stripper name." Arnold retorted.

"Well, Tim was suggesting Xavier, and D.A. came up with Claudia, how do those sound?"

Arnol sighed, "I don't know Phoebe, the baby's coming soon and I just don't wanna think about it right now."

"At my old school, we never got pregnant…" Phoebe recalled.

A swift, loud slap sound was made as Arnold's hand slammed into Phoebe's face, making it turn a rosy red. 

"Shut the fuck up you fat whore!" Arnold yelled, "This isn't your old school!"

Phoebe rubbed her face, and continued walkiing.

"What are those things?" the black girl pointed at a herd of pig-sized creatures with bulky, muscular builds, sprawled legs, flat faces with parrot like beaks, and two short, tusk-like canines protruding downward from their mouths. They were grazing.

"Well Keesha, according to my research, those things are called _Lystrosaurus_ ; they were part of a family of burrowing synapsids called Dicynodonts and were one of the only land animals to survive The Great Dying." explained Dorothy-Ann ("D.A." for short).

"Is it just me, or do those dino-dogs look hungry?" remarked Ralphie.

Everyone looked to where he was pointing, their stood a pack of terrifying creatures who were built somewhat like dogs, except a lot more muscular, and with sprawled out legs like a crocoldile, and a long narrow snout with sabre teeth.

"Those are Gorgonopsids Ralphie!" Ms. Frizzle said in a cheery voice, "They were the top predators of their day! But remember, these creatures were synapsids, which were closely related to modern mammals, while dinosaurs were diapsids which were closely related to modern birds and reptiles."

The gorgonopsids caught sent of the class, and showed their teeth. The class screamed and began fleeing. The prehistoric predators continued to chase them, but the class was running ata a fast speed, so they coundlt catch up. The class made it to the bus and everyone scrambelled their way into the bus. The gorgonopsids started clawing at and ramming the side of the vehicle.

"What are we waiting for the Friz?" questioned Carlos, "Take us home!"

"It seems as though the bus is out of fuel…" Mrs. Frizzle responded.

"OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!1!111!" The class shouted in unison.

Everyone began panicking, "Oh bad, oh bad bad bad" said Keesha.

"What are we gonna do what are we gonna do what are we gonna do!" shouted Wanda.

"Don't Fret class!, all we have to do is refuel the bsus!" said Ms. Frizzle.

"Okay… what fuel does the bus run on?" asked Phoebe.

"People" Ms. Frizzle responded

"This bus fucking eats people?!" retorted Ralphie.

Tim turned to Ralphie, "Well of coarse, why do you think we're the only class in the entire school? I don't even think we have a principle."

"Well you know what that means…" said Carlos, "One of us is gonna have to become bus food…" he looked around, "Whose it gonna be?"

The class looked around at eachother, each kid drenched in sweat, gulping, and tugging at their collars, for one of them would not be going home today. Arnold looked at Phoebe his love, who was carrying his unborn child. Arnold looked down at his feet and closed his eyes, he knew what he had to do.

"Mrs. Frizzle" Arnold announced raising his hand, "I'll go."

"Arnold?" everyone said in unison, shocked.

"No! You can't!" responded Phoebe, about to cry. "What about our baby?"

"That's precisely who I'm doing this for. A kid's gotta do what a kid's a kid's gotta do. And I know what I gotta do."

"Don't say that Arnolf!" Tears were rolling down Pheobe's cheeks.

"We haven't a choice… I love you Phoebe…"

"We'll never forget you Arnold!" shouted D.A.

Just then, everybody group hugged Arnold, and everyone was crying, even Keesha, who was the tough one. Arnold walked out of the bus, everyone was staring at him, with some waving their final goodbyes. But Phoebe, she strapped her bones into the seat, and broke out into tears, burying her face into her hands.

Arnold walked out into the front of the bus, the bus stared right at him. Arnold's last stand was about to begin.

"My oh my, you look mighty tasty!" said the bus in a fat sassy black lady voice.

Arnold walked toward the bus's open mouth and jumped in. The bus began chewing and loud crunches and piercing screams were heard as the bus' metal jaws were crushing the 9-year old's bones.

"Mmm!" Said the bus, "Yummeh yummeh in mah tummeh!"

The bus began to rapidly spin around like a tornado and levatating. The kids inside went "WOOOAAAAH!" While Ms. Frizle did her signature "YAHOOOO!". The bus disappeared in a bright flash of light and began flying through time. Suddenly, a loud alram was heard.

"What's happening?" panicked Tim.

"Hmm… It seems like eating Arnold wasn't enough to fuel the bus completely…" observed Mrs. Frizzle, "Hold on tight class!"

The bus then fell out of the wormhole it was flying through.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Seeing Double

The bus crashed into the ground. Everyone was so relieved they weren't died. Everyone looked out the windows and noticed they were in a place that looked exactly like home, so they naturally assumed it was. Everyone exited the bus exhausted from their previous ordeal.

"Oh boy! It's time for lunch!" Exclaimed Wanda.

"Too bad Phoebe keeps eating all the mallow blasters…" complained Ralphie.

"What's your excuse fatass?" retorted Phoebe, "I'm carrying a life!"

"Now this is something I can really sink my teeth into!" commented Carlos.

"CARLOS!"

"Wait!" exclaimed Phoebe, the bus started making noises, and out of it's exhaust pipe came out a bunch of bones. And then a skull with curly orange hair an glasses.

"Oh Arnold!" Phoebe wailed, she began sobbing and clutching the skeletal remains of her lover.

"Oh… that's right…" said Wanda, "Arnold's dead isn't he?"

"Well this is awkward…" remarked Tim.

"Cease this tomfoolery Phoebe!" exclaimed Keesha, yanking Phoebe from the piles of bones, "He's gone."

"Your right Keesha…" Phoebe said, sniffling. "He is gone forever and never ever coming back!" She broke down on the pavement and began blubbering once more.

"I think we should give her some space…" Whispered Ms. Frizzle.

"Good idea." Responded D.A.

So they made they're way into the schoolbuilding, passing several inexplicably empty rooms until finding their classroom. Ms. Frizzle kicked down the door and was greeted with a most perplexing sight. She saw herself and the entire class in the middle of a lesson. It obviously wasn't them but it was a group of people completely identical Ms. Frazzle and her class! The doppelganger class turned to see the two Ms. Frizzles staring awkwardly at eachother.

"What's going on?" inquired Tim.

Everyone just stood there awkwardly starring at eachother. The rest of the class made their way into the classroom to observe the completely identical counterparts of themselves.

"Well, you know what gotta do in times like this!" declared Ms. Frizzle.

"And what might that be?" Inquired the other Ms. Frizzle.

"TAKE CHANCES, GET MESSY, MAKE MISTAKES!" she bellowed, pulling out an AK-47 and opening fire at the other Mrs. Frizzle and her class. The loud rat-a-tat-tat from the metal spitting menace drove the lookalike class in a frenzy of panic. The cacophonous screech of bullet-filled death set a blazing ring drilling through the class's eardrums.

The class that wasn't the identical class then pulled out there weapons. Ralphie pulled out a 9,000,000 calibur pistol, Wanda cocked her rifle, D.A. pulled a nail gun out of her book, Tim was using another pistal (except it was being held sideways because he's black), Keesha activated her semi-automatic rapid fire double-barreled shotgun, Carlos had a flamethrower, and Phoebe utilized two uzis and they all attacked their strangely similar equivalents.

"Is this murder or suicide?" asked other Tim,

"Both." Said real Tim, he shot the other Tim and he was dead.

"Goddamnit!" shouted Ralphie, I think I just the other Arnold!"

When the noise stopped, the floor was littered with bodies. Two minutes later, they were all struggling to get the very heavy garbage bag full of bodies into the dumpster. After much effort the black trashbag with blood leaking out crashed inside the retagular metal box of trash.

"Well class, let's just pretend this never happened!" instructed Mrs. Frizzle.

"But how did we come across those imposters?" inquired Wanda, "What were they doing here and why?"

"According to my research, we fell into a parallel universe once the bus ran out of fuel during it's time travel."

"At my old school, we never got marooned in alternate dimensions and went on mass shootings that involved brutally murdering the alternate universe equivalents of ourselves effectively replacing them!" lamented Phoebe.

"Yeah, it's real in-SAME isn't it?"

"CARLOS!" everyone yelled.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Arnold's Funeral

The next day everyone was gathered at the nearby cemetery for a funeral for Arnold. It was a bright and sunny morning which made Phoebe sad because funerals were supposed to be rainy and the fact that it looked so bright and happy outside felt insulting to her. She was dressed in a black dress and her usual headband was replaced with a black one.

Ms. Frizzle was the one to stood up first, being Arnold's favorite teacher and having Arnold as his favorite student. She was the one doing the funeral because they cound't afford a preist. Also they couldn't affrod a hole or tombstone or casket either, so they pulled a body out of his casket and fed it to the bus.

"Arnold Perlstein was a very kind, brave student of mine I will always fondly remember for his courage and bravery. He was a great student, great freind, and would've been a great father to if he wasn't died. But he is though, and he's never ever comimg back." Mrs. Frizzle said.

Then the various kids in the class went up to go talk about him except Phoebe because she was still struken with grief. The first one up was Ralphie, who was wearing a black suit and business tie, and his hat was on forward this time.

"Gee, I'm sure am gonna miss Arnold…" he pouted. "But not that bitch Janet though, I hope she doesn't exist in this universe."

The next one to go up was Wanda, who was wearing a white dress with grey high heels that she walked awkwardly in.

"Well, at least Arnold will be happy to hear that there isn't any field trips inn Heaven." She said.

Keesha was up next. She was weraing a navy blue dress and black belt her hair wasn't braided and it drooped down her shoulders.

"Death isn't something you think can happen to you until it does…" she lamented.

D.A. came after her, visibly wiping tears from her face as she arose in a black dress with a black drape covering the upper half of her face.

She sniffled, "I will always remember that one time Arnild grew giant and fought a T-Rex ( _Tyrannosaurus rex_ ) although considering square cube law that really shouldn't have been possible, but it was still a very nice thing." She said, holding back tears.

Carlos was the last to get up, he was wearing a business suit and had his hair combed to the side.

"I must say, this is a BURY sad day for me!"

"CARLOS!"

"You were very lucky to have so many good friends Arnold. So long!" said Ms. Frizzle. They lowered his casket into the ground. Tim was playing "Amazing Grace" on bagpipes but it was unrecognizable Tim didn't know how to play bagpipes.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Post-Mortem Pow-Wow

After the funeral, everybody made it back to the school where they decided to spend the rest of the day playing Super Smash Brothers for Game Sphere Extended Turbo Competetive Edition & Knuckles. It was like Smash Bros. for Wii U combined with the 3DS one, except with more stages, Turbo Mode, and new characters. The class used to play 8 player smash, which was perfect because there were 8 of them in the class, but now there was only 7…

"I don't get it!" said Keesha, "Where's Phoebe?, she's never late for smash!"

"I saw her earlier in the bathroom, she still hasn't come out yet." Replied Tim.

"Maybe she's got a bad case of MOURNING sickness!" joked Carlos.

"CARLOS!" everything replied.

"Let me handle this." D.A. said. "According to my research, only I can handle sensitive topics like this."

"Works for me." replied Wanda.

"Hey guys, what should I put on the pizza?", asked Ralphie.

"Let's settle it in Smash!" shouted Keesha.

D.A. walked into the bathroom, and saw Phoebe sobbing in the mirror, tears flowing down her cheeks created black lines.

"Phoebe?" said D.A, "I know your sad, but according to my research, you shouldn't cry so hard, you might force yourself into laber!"

"Shut up DA!" yelled Phoebe, "You don't know how I feel!"

"Phoebe I miss him too" responded D.A., "But crying like a bitch won't bring Arnold back. According to my research, instead of being sad hes gone, you should be happy you got to know him!"

"*Sniff* I guess you're right… *second sniff* I still have to raise his baby." Phoebe lamented

"That's the sprit Phobe!" D.A. smiled, "now lets go play smash!'

It was fun to play smash. Wanda mained Duck Hunt, Snake, Mario, and Bayonetta.. Tim played Corrin, Marth and Lucina, Zero Suit Samus and Luigi. Ralphie was a Shrek main, but also played Wario due to Shrek being a clone of him. Keesha used Captain Falcon, Falco, Greninja and Knuckles. Carlos "mained" Charizard, but although all he really did is go to the edge of the stage and spammed rock smash. D.A.'s favorites were Mewtwo, Lucario (the Mewtwo clone), Bowser Jr., and Peach. Phoebe liked to play the cute characters like Pikachu, Yoshi, Toon Link, Jigglypuff, and Juno (who she empathized with because they were both pregnant). Mrs. Frizzle liked to play Diddy Kong, Sonic, Mega Man and Pac Man because they "matched her personality". Arnold used to be the most skilled player. He had mastered every single character but mained Pichu. He would also sometimes use the Ice Climbers to symbolize his love for Phoebe, they even made Mii Fighters for eachother sos they could work together to take everyone out in team battles. But now they couldn't do that because now Arnold was dead, and dead people don't play Super Smash Brothers.

Everyone was having a jolly old time playing Smah while eating pizza and fighting in Shrek's swamp.

"You know I've been thinking…" said Keesha, "Why didn't we just kill the gorgonopsids?"

"No! We should'nt have!" said Phoebe, "They were just doing what was natural. You know something, I think your really taking Arnold for granite."

"What do you mean?" questioned Keesha.

"You're implying that Arnold's sacrifice was meaningless and made no sense." Explained Phoebe.

"Well it didn't!" Keesha retorted, "He could've easily just turned giant like he did the last time we time travelled and just stomped them to death. He was a kind of a dumbass not to"

"You take that back bitch!"\

"Make me whore!"

It was then Phiebe and Keehsa stopped fighting in smash and started fighting in real life! They kicked, puched, scratched, and pulled eachother's hair.

"Oh yeah! Cat fight!" cheered Ralphie.

The fight continued to escalate more and more, until Keesha delivered a devastating blow by karate kicking Phoebe's heavily pregnant abdomen, sending her flying backward. Suddenly, she howled in agony and fluid began pouring out from her dress all over the floor.

"Arg! I'm going into laber!" screamed Phoebe.

"WATER you waiting for? Deliver her baby!" said Carlos.

"CARLOS!" everyone screamed.

Tim put on his baby delivering gloves. It was time for action.

"You can do it Phoebe! Push! Push!" encouraged Wanda.

"Breathe regularly." Advised D.A.

"At my old school, we never gave birth in class!" said Phoebe.

"Yeah, so this must be a brood-al experience!" commented Carlos.

"CARLOS!"

Phoebe let out a howl of agony, tears and sweat were flowing down her face. Ralphie took out a tissue and wiped it across Pheobe's forehead.

"Your doing great Phoebe! I can see the head, so don't give up now!" encouraged Tim.

Tim reached inside Phoebe so he could pull out the baby by the head. He could already see the orange, curly hair the child had, but it suddenly began turning black! Tim was confused, but became flabbergasted when the baby's head withdrew back into Phoebe! She felt a strange feeling of something heavy entering her uterus, she didn't know what it was, but it couldn't have been good.

"What happened?" asked Ralphie,

"I don't know." Responded D.A.

"If only Arnold were here. He'd take this time to lament on the fact that he should've stayed home today!" said Wanda.

Suddenly, Phoebe's belly exploded with a loud popping noise. Blood and guts flew everywhere and painted the walls red with blood. All of them starred in shock and terror at Phoebe's mangled corpse. Standing above it was a figure that came out, it looked exactly like Arnold except it had pale skin, black hair, and a purple striped shirt with red jeans.

"Muhuhahahahahahahahahaha!" the figure laughed evilly.

"I. AM. DARKNOLD!"


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Entrenched!

"What the shitting fuck?" questioned Keesha.

"According to my research," Explanned D.A., "When the bus was crashing in from another universe, we passed through a cloud of evil energy. And after Arnold died, he tried to reincarnate himself into Phoebe's baby. But then Phoebe breathed in the evil energy and it corrupted the fetus that was developing into a new Arnold, essentially turning him into a Dark Arnold, or should I say, Darknold!"

Darknold began assending into the air, his eyes glew red and he began shooting red lightening out of his hands.

"Muhuhahahahah! That's right! And now im gonna destroy the world!"

Suddenly, Ms Frizzle appeared, "Not so fast Darknold! I'm gonna stop you!"

"Class! Get ready for a field trip!" she commanded.

"Right!" responded everyone.

"Lizz, Activate the bus!"

"You know it babe!" said Liz.

Liz runned his way out of the door, grabbed the keys and hopped in the bus. Mrs. Frizzle and the class soon followed. The keys were turned and the bus spun around in a tornado and transformed into a transformer with arms legs and a torso.

In response, Darknold grew exactly 50 feet tall and shooting lazers from his eyes and electricity bolts from his fingers. The evil giant boy then punched his chest like a gorilla and stomped on the ground side to side.

"Time to get funky!" said the bus.

The bus laid a big giant punch on Darknold, causing him to stumble backwards with a blody nose. Darknold writhed in pain and roared furiously. He countered by kicking the bus and the fell backwards and got back up.

"Youre going down! Darknold!" mrs Frizzle remarked.

The bus then pull of Darknold's glasses.

"Hey! Those are mine! Give them back!" he whimpered

Darknod blindly charged forward, while the bus put its hand into Darknold's face causing him to flail his arms autistically in a desperate attempt to reobtain his spectacles.

"I _see_ what you mean!" Carlos cuckled.

"CAROLS!" said everyone

The bus fired drilling missles from it's nipples that pierced into Darnolds' eyes. He howled in pain as his corneas were penetrated. The missles exploded causing blood and eye goop to splatter everwhere.

"You just got Frizzled!" remarked Tim.

Draknold fell to the ground in immense pain, his eyesballs just exploded while his mouth was wide open because he was screaming. The bus pulled out all of Darkold's teeth one by one and yanked out his uvula. The bus then violently tore open Darknold's abdomen with its bear hands and pulled out his intestines and ate them. Darknold tried to get up but before he could do that the bus took his legs and snapped both of them forward where thay were supposed to bend backwards. Daknold howled in agony and while his mouth was open the bus squatted over and started shitting in his mouth. The hole that used to contain his intestines filled up with poop that was once his intestines. After that the bus grabbed Darknold's bottom jaw and forced it downward, tearing it off.

"Let's finish this!" shouted Keesha, "For Arnold and Phoebe!"

"Way ahead of ya Keesh!" Ms. Frazzle responded.

The bus then stuck two nukes into Darknold's eye sockets, they both exploded Darnold's head off and he was dead. Blood and brains flew all over the place and Ms. Drizzle and the class covered their eyes from the brightness. The bus turned back to normal and they all got out to see Darknold's headless body with shit oozing from his pants and everone cheered.

"Hip Hop Hooray!" cheered Tim.

"He's finaly dead!" said Wanda.

"According to my research, everything's back to normal!" chanted D.A.

"It's all over!" screeched Raplphie.

"That was awesome!" complimented Keesha.

"You could even say it was Mech-Tacular!" added Carlos.

" _ **CARLOS!"**_ everyone responded.

"Ms. Frizzle, I have locks of hair from Arnold and Phoebe, can we put them into the cloning machine?" asked Wanda.

"Stupendous thought, Wanda!" said Ms. Frizzle.

The bus transformed itslef into a cloning machine. Ms. Frizzle put the hairs of Arnold and Phiebe into the machine and out came Arnold and Pheobe!

"Hooray" said everyone

"It feels great to be alive again!" said Phoebe.

"Oh how I missed you guys!" said Arnold.

"Welcome back Arnold and Phoebe! You two look stunning!" said Mrs. Frizzle.

"Well, not being preggers anymore helps," Phoebe responded.

"Is it just me, or does everything around here look uncharacteristically barren?" Ralphie remarked.

Everybody looked around, the sky was red with black clouds, there were no buildings, trees or anything anywhere in sight, only dirt and cracked ground.

"Looks like we got our just deserts!" joked Carlos.

"CARLOS!" responded everyone

"According to my research, when the two nukes went off and destroyed Darknold, it caused a nuclear fallout that destroyed everything. We're the last human beings on Earth!" explained DA.

"I knew I shoulda stayed home today…" lamented Arnld.

"At my old school, we never caused the apocalypse!" recalled Phobe.

"Whose up for a field trip?" asked Ms. Frizzle.

Everyone cheered and got into a certain yellow school bus, a Magic School Bus. It was time for another adventure.

"Please let this be a normal field trip…" said Arnold, crossing his fingers.

The seven other children gathered around him.

"With the Friz? NO WAY!"


End file.
